he always knows
the right thing to do
whenever I am upset.
he always has new ideas to impress me
and his ideas always succeed in making me smile.
there are these things he says with his eyes,
things that always make me shed a tear or two,
asking myself a question –
"What did I do to deserve this kind of love?"
he knows when I want to be alone
and I hate it when at such times
he pulls at my sleeve
and forces me to walk out of the house
but when I drive with him to our favorite spot
and snuggle close to him under the starry sky,
my heart always fills with happiness and optimism.
at times, it also fills my heart with fear,
fear of losing him.
I always fear losing him
because I know I am not his first choice.
I know some day someone else is going to come
and take him away from me.
brushing those thoughts aside
I try to enjoy my days with him.
when he is with me,
he is completely loyal to me
and that is what matters the most.
When he is around, I feel secure,
I know that no one would ever dare touch me
or trouble me in his presence.
we share a bed large enough –
to accommodate three people
yet I allow him to snuggle close to me
and at times let him keep his head over my chest
and listen to my heart sounds
as I run my fingers through his hair.
in the mornings,
as he wakes me up in the only way he knows
it makes me start my day with a smile
and I really enjoy that.
he knows how much I love him
and how much I care for him.
despite my busy schedule
I love to cook for him
and when he eats as if he has never eaten before,
I feel happy.
he is always there to welcome me
whenever I return home from work
and that really makes me look forward –
to returning home.
the moment I enter the house,
I give him a warm hug
and all the stress simply evaporates in thin air.
however,
I know this is going to change soon.
very soon the doorbell would ring
and as I open the door,
he would walk to the door with me
and after seeing the person at the door,
he will rush into the arms of that person.
I cannot blame him, she owns him.
he has always been hers
and though he loves me,
I know he cannot be with me.
As I said earlier,
I am not his first choice.
despite all this,
I am sure -
he would be there for me, always.
he would be next door
and whenever I call him,
he will answer my call.
as he rests his head on my lap,
running my fingers through his hair
I await the moment
when she will take him with her
and almost immediately the doorbell rings.
he gets up
and rushes to the door before I do.
does that mean he loves her more –
than he loves me?
I guess, I should leave that question unanswered.
that question does not make any sense.
that question is applicable to humans like us
categorizing love in different forms
and percentages.
love for him is simply love
and he loves those who love him.
I walk to the door
and open it for my neighbor -
she is here to take back her dog
she had left with me for a few weeks
because she was out of town.
as I get down on my knees
and kiss his furry head,
I know in my heart
that he would love me
just the way he has loved me all this time
and he is only a call away
when I need caring and security.
Return to Main Page
